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Pick Up Line
updated: Aug 07, 2010, 10:00 AM

Dear Edda,

I don't like to interrupt what I am doing when my phone rings. I mean, who is the master of whom, me or my phone? However, my friends get mad at me when I don't pick-up. Do I have to? Is it my obligation to my friends and the world that every time they call I must jump up immediately and answer, like a trained poodle? Do I really have to talk to someone on the phone whenever that someone wants to? Or, is it my right as a human being and citizen of the world to pick-up or not pick-up as I see fit?


Pick Up When I Want To


Dear Picks up When You Want To:

You. No. No. No. Yes.


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Edda Hatte is a loving and sympathetic advice columnist who helps Edhat subscribers navigate through their complicated and stressful lives. Send your questions to askedda@edhat.com.

Comments in order of when they were received | (reverse order)

 SHOREBIRD agree helpful negative off topic

2010-08-07 10:35 AM

Once again. Brilliant answer by Edda. It is your phone. It is for your convenience. If your friends want the phone to automatically be answered every time they could consider buying you a trained poodle.


 COMMENT 96192 agree helpful negative off topic

2010-08-07 11:30 AM

You make your own choices. You weigh and balance the alternatives and then you decide. This is a great way to stop feeling helpless.


 COMMENT 96210P agree helpful negative off topic

2010-08-07 01:48 PM

Love my answering machine. I tell friends that I screen my calls and to leave a message -- if I'm home and I want to talk, I'll pick up.


 COMMENT 96232 agree helpful negative off topic

2010-08-07 04:12 PM

Short & sweet. Gotta love Edda.


 COMMENT 96253 agree helpful negative off topic

2010-08-07 07:48 PM

This is why e-mail is so much better than the phone for most purposes. It is not intrusive. It allows both parties to be equally in control of their use of time.

Most communications are not urgent. And, with a bit of advance planning, it is easy to avoid the need for urgent interruptions.

After all, how did people get by before all of this instant communication? With a lot less stress.


 COMMENT 96262P agree helpful negative off topic

2010-08-07 10:33 PM

One ringy dingy, two ringy dingy...


 COMMENT 96297 agree helpful negative off topic

2010-08-08 11:49 AM

I get a kick out of this question, as I do not have a cell, and my phone does not have an answering machine or call waiting. I am always amazed at people saying that I called but you did your line was busy (yep and so was I) and when they realize the phone just rings then obviously, I am busy elsewhere. But, better yet my phone does show who phoned, so I can call them back. And I have been known to turn the ringer off when I am doing other things. In case of Emergency I have a old little pager.


 COMMENT 96311 agree helpful negative off topic

2010-08-08 01:27 PM

96253: you are right, but you need to check the account. That's the reason I prefer SMS: they arrive and you get the advise, but to read or not, to answer now or later, is your choice....
Besides, in a phone call you must be polite and say "Hello, how you doing....How is your cat...Good by, ....See you, ....Care yourself..." and it's time consuming. In message you just answer the essential, and it's fine.:)


 COMMENT 96316 agree helpful negative off topic

2010-08-08 02:00 PM

People used to tell me to get call waiting. I told them I had it, it's called a busy signal! I love caller i d, that way I can choose when I want to talk. It makes life a lot simpler.


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